Volid Review: Right-Wing Facebook Ads

So, perhaps, like any good filler kid, you have put your own face onto the master book of faces, known as The Face Book™? If so, you might have seen the advertisements that give this free website that doesn't seem to sell or produce anything of significance with an annual revenue of $800 million+ and an estimated value of $10-15 billion. They obviously know me very well, as most of the ads targeted at me are for time-shares, condos, joining the FBI/SWAT/CIA and teeth whitening (for only $1 because a "millionaire gives back").

But the overarching trend of the previous several months has been the build-up to the November midterm election, in which America Was Taken Back. Now the U.S. will have its first orange-American Speaker of the House in John Boehner, among other many other great victories for the Tea Party (and therefore America). Since politicians have always valued exposure to the public, or "face time", as some are wont to say, let us examine the ads on that modern place for face time, The Face Book™:

Volid Review: Fantasy Mission Force

You may have noticed that your Editor-in-Chief of the Volidity Report was on a bit of a hiatus, but this did not mean that volidity ceased to be promulgated. On the contrary, sir and/or madam! I have been on the lecture circuit, hitting up some of the most distinguished lecture halls in Brooklyn, New York. Your Editor-in-Chief was invited by an exquibulary film screening organization called Cinebeasts (of which he is a proud board member) to introduce a gripping historical documentary on September 29th. The documentary, Fantasy Mission Force (starring Jackie "Jacky" Chan), is the story of an elite commando force; however, unlike say, The Dirty Dozen or the Inglorious Basterds (sic—tsk, tsk on your spelling, Mr. Tarantino!), this film is absolutely accurate and True. Why, just see for yourself in video and below, with the slides of my lecture:

Gentlemen, Ladies, and Others, Fantasy Mission Force has been evaluated. I hope to see you on my next stop on my lecture tour, and yes, I will gladly sign an autograph in exchange for a small fee/amount of vodka.

Volid Review: Belarus Magazine

Ah, the venerable PR magazine. Glossy, with short articles full of fun facts—and, of course—many an image. Every organization that can publishes them, with the purpose of making you feel all warm inside and distracting from any nasty inquiries about specific policies. For example, when reading the magazine Saudi Aramco World, one is more likely to think, "Wow, neato—the Abu Dhabi book festival" than ponder the influence and control exercized around the globe by the world's largest oil company.
Enter Belarus magazine. Founded by the Information Ministry of the Republic of Belarus and supported logistically by the offices of Sovetskaya Belorussiya and financially by Belvnesheconombank, I picked up a copy of Belarus in 2007 at the Belarusian Embassy in Washington, DC. Published in Belarusian (as Беларусь), English, and German (curiously, not as Weißrussland, but also as Belarus), the magazine claims to be "distributed in 50 countries of the world" and "published since 1930"[?!].