Morgantown Secedes: Brooklyn in Crisis

Breaking news from the Volidity Report's own in-house wire service, Volidity Report Press (VRP, pronounced "verp"): over the past weekend, an area of Brooklyn seceded and formed its own independent neighborhood as "Morgantown." Long a disputed territory, it was once considered to be part of Bushwick but has been claimed more recently--by the bureaucrats and moneyed interests in a move much resented by locals--to be "East Williamsburg." Confused and oppressed, the neighborhood's identity is muddled further by outsiders and in-migrants using monickers like "Bushburg" or even "Robertasville" (named for the estate of a local pizza magnate). Beyond said pizzeria (which has indeed found acceptance), the locals feel besieged by the encroachment of carpetbaggers, with their strange and out-of-place businesses. Finally, with all around them in crisis, the locals have elected a new "Governor", who has declared Morgantown an independent neighborhood, separate from both Williamsburg and Bushwick. Below is an excerpt of his fiery oratory:

Thus, it seems, in Brooklyn as in Florida, North is South (and vice-versa). Numerous interviews suggest that if even if this rebellion is unsuccessful, The Town of Morgan shall rise again! At the very least, fueled by local, organic foods and Four Loko, the Morgantowners remain a force to be reckoned with. Look to the Volidity Report Press for future developments...

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